Autographed Tour Shirts Page Two
Transition


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My cousin Jimmy is the drummer for this band. The guys were having rehearsal and he arranged for them to sign a shirt. He brought it to Thanksgiving dinner and of all people he forgot to autograph the shirt. We scrounged up a marker to complete the shirt.
Ted Leo + The Pharmacists


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Ted drew a grey speckled something on the shirt (too many beers to remember). Along with The Pharmacists, I included Chris Leo's siggy and doodle. Hey, I'm all for sibling rivalry.
One Star Hotel


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Daryl Hirsch, the keyboard player, was dumbfounded when I asked him to sign the shirt. I said you got a better idea of what I should do with it? He said dryly, "Yeah, wear it." Classic.
My shirt wanted list: Ryan Adams, My Morning Jacket, , Bobby Bare Jr., The Mendoza Line, Centro-matic, Neko Case, The Sadies, Cake, Guided By Voices (Robert Pollard), Roger Waters, Two Cow Garage, World Party (Karl Wallinger), U2(see below), New Kids On The Block
Speaking of U2, my dad is now a limo driver and U2 came to town in 2002. He drove Bono and The Edge to and from the show. Another driver drove Adam Clayton and Larry Mullin Jr. to the show. The guy made the mistake of asking them for their autograph on a piece of paper. He was immediately fired on the spot. Now I knew my dad was driving them so I ran out to Media Play and got an All That You Can Leave Behind shirt with the slim chance he can get an autograph. Fuck, he was in the car with them. My dad is playing it cool all night and approaches the tour manager at the end of the night and says my son's a huge fan, could he possibly get the band to sign the shirt if it's not too much trouble. Very nice and polite. The guy says sure, you have been cool all night, give me your business card and I'll send it too you. Two years later I'm still waiting. Arrogant, grimey, too big for their britches, asshole rock stars. Fuck them. I'm out $20. But then again you never know, I am a very patient man.
Some Helpful Hints
So now you see this collection and you want to get band members to sign and doodle on your tour shirt, right? Well just follow these simple steps.
Never get too plastered! The more alcohol you imbibe, the less the chance you are to be in control and get the chance to have your shirt signed. Hey, having a few drinks isn't bad. It loosens you up a bit and enables you to take risks. Nobody likes an obnoxious loser blabbering on and on about their favorite song.
Never offer up to have them sign your name. Sometimes it's not avoidable. They are already signing "TO HUGH". Not that I want to eventually sell my shirts or anything, I prefer them to be signed to "Everyman".
Always come prepared. Two black sharpies, one silver. When you are waiting with a crowd for the musicians to come out it never fails that some asshole, usually drunk, is sitting there with nothing in their hand except their dick and want to bum your sharpie. What are you gonna say to Otis, NO? You don't need that right at that moment.
Always be polite and appreciative. It's not printed on the ticket that you are going to get an autograph. They really don't have to do it. It's a nice gesture to be thankful.